President Hinckley once said, “Of all the creations of the Almighty, there is none more beautiful, none more inspiring than a lovely daughter of God who walks in virtue, with an understanding of why she should do so, who honors and respects her body as sacred and divine, who cultivates her mind and constantly enlarges the horizon of her understanding, who nurtures her spirit with everlasting truth.”
Today, we’ll examine the lives of Ruth and Hannah and their beautiful stories, and, as we do so, I think you’ll come to see that these were the type of women President Hinckley described. They were women of virtue and honor—who put the things of God first in their lives and were blessed because they did so.
For now, we’ll just look at the life at Ruth. When a famine hit Israel, Elimelech; his wife, Naomi, and their two sons moved to Moab, which was not affected by the famine. While there, Elimelech died, leaving Naomi a widow. Her two sons soon married, one married Orpah; the other married Ruth. But, after 10 years, they too passed away. So Naomi’s family was reduced to just her two daughters-in-law, both of whom were Moabites, the longtime enemies of Israel.
It was at this point that Naomi decided to return to Bethlehem. Naomi knew that Bethlehem wouldn’t be the best locale for her widowed daughters-in-law. There, they were likely to face bigotry and have to scavenge for food. Naomi told them of the troubles that would lie ahead and begged them to stay in Moab.
Ruth and Orpah were both converts to the church. They had both entered into covenants with their husbands when they married them. But now that they were widowed, both would have to decide just how much those covenants meant to them. Would they choose the comfort, familiarity and ease of Moab or the difficulties that lie ahead in Bethlehem? In likening this to us, the ease of Moab represents the ease that comes in following the world; the difficulty of Bethlehem represents the difficulty of coming unto Christ. Whether Orpah or Ruth would decide to remain in Moab or go to Bethlehem depended on just how deeply the word of the Lord had sunk into their hearts.
The Savior once told the Parable of the Sower, saying:
“Behold, a sower went forth to sow;
“And when he sowed, some seeds fell by the way side, and the fowls came and devoured them up:
“Some fell upon stony places, where they had not much earth: and forthwith they sprung up, because they had no deepness of earth:
“And when the sun was up, they were scorched; and because they had no root, they withered away.
“And some fell among thorns; and the thorns sprung up, and choked them:
“But other fell into good ground, and brought forth fruit, some an hundredfold, some sixtyfold, some thirtyfold” (Math 13:4-8).
Now, let’s look at Orpah and Ruth’s decision and see which seeds they proved to be. Orpah chose Moab and returned unto her gods. After 10 years of conversion, the fear of what lay ahead choked off her faith. So what kind of seed was planted in Orpah’s heart? She was like a seed who fell among thorns. The Savior in explaining this type of convert said: “He also that received seed among the thorns is he that heareth the word; and the care of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, choke the word, and he becometh unfruitful” (Matthew 13:22).
Indeed, no fruit came forth from Orpah because she had turned her back on the eternal family because of the cares of the world.
It’s at this point that Naomi once again pled with Ruth to do the same, saying, “Behold, thy sister in law is gone back unto her people, and unto her gods: return thou after thy sister in law” (Ruth 1:15).
I want you to listen to the nobility and the love in Ruth’s reply:
“And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
“Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the LORD do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me” (Ruth 1:16-17).
So what kind of seed was Ruth? Obviously, she was the kind that fell into the good ground. Of her and those like her, the Savior said: “But he that received seed into the good ground is he that heareth the word, and understandeth it; which also beareth fruit, and bringeth forth, some an hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty.”
The more we discuss Ruth, the more impressed you will be by her. But it’s important to know that the good things she did in her life started because she let the Spirit write upon her heart the truths that God lives and that Jesus is the Christ. She was the kind of person Paul was describing when he talked about those whose testimonies are “written not with ink, but with the Spirit of the living God; not in tables of stone, but in fleshy tables of the heart” (2 Corinthians 3:3). I have felt that Spirit testify often in my life that Christ is real; that He does live and that He did love me enough to come to Earth and endure all the shames, persecutions, sufferings, bleedings, etc. that He did so that I might have a chance to be cleansed and return to my Heavenly Father. I have learned so often how much Christ really is there for me—even when it seems no one else is. And, indeed, I feel that the Spirit has written on my heart, like it did on Ruth’s heart, this truth: I know my Redeemer lives.
So what fruit did Ruth bring forth? In time, she would marry and have a son. That line continued on. And, among her offspring is the One who gave the parable of the sower. The mortal Christ descended from Ruth.
I want us to return to that beautiful statement Ruth made to Naomi:
“And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
“Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the LORD do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me” (Ruth 1:16-17).
In these verses, Ruth is showing a great amount of loyalty. She knows the difficulties that lay ahead. But that doesn’t deter her. Because she loves Naomi, she doesn’t want Naomi to be alone in her old age. I think that in her decision to forsake all that she had in Moab to take care of her mother-in-law in a strange land, Ruth is teaching us about the importance of the eternal family relationship.
How could Ruth, who had loved her husband so deeply, turn her back on his mother?
How could Ruth turn her back on the covenants that sealed her to her husband?
Moreover, what is it that makes life meaningful? Is it your possessions, your comforts or your Halo scores? When He was on the Earth, Christ once said, "Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth" (Luke 12:15)
So if it’s not possessions that matter, what does? I submit that what really matters is your relationships—and what relationships really matter? Your relationships with your family members and with your God. We are sent here to create, build and maintain eternal family relationships through following the pattern our Heavenly Father has shown. If we are successful in building those relationships here, we can share in His work there.
Earlier this week, I talked to a friend who recently got engaged. And she told me that some people had told her that she making a huge mistake—they said to her that love doesn’t last, and you’re better off staying single. Fortunately, she was smart enough to not buy what they were selling. Still, it really ate at me, so I told her later, “It really bothers me that some [people] take such a negative view on marriage. I think it’s great you have found that special eternal love. [And] I predict that when you get to the end of your life and you look back you will say that everything good in my life came from my decision to marry [him in the temple]. I believe the quality of our lives is marked by the quality of our relationships, if someone were to be single forever they would miss out on the best life [because they would miss out on the best relationships—the relationships between husband and wife and parent and child].”
I think Ruth is teaching us that nothing is as important as family. Let’s take a more in-depth look at verse 16: “Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge.” (Ruth 1:16). In families, we go where our families go because we love them and, if they can’t take care of themselves or if they are in trouble, we want to be there for them.
“Thy people shall be my people,” Ruth said. Isn’t this true: When you get married, you’re saying, “I want your family to be my family. I love you so much I want the people you love to be the people I love?” Isn’t that what Ruth did? She loved Naomi’s son, and because she loved Naomi’s son, she felt a great love and loyalty toward his mother. In thinking about that, I thought back to one of my English professors at BYU, Sister Gunn. One Monday, Sister Gunn started off class by telling us how happy she was that her daughter-in-law got married over the weekend. It was a strange sentence, so it caught my attention. Daughter-in-law got married? That makes no sense. If she’s your daughter-in-law, shouldn’t she already be married?
But then Sister Gunn explained that her son had died a few years earlier. And, then, Sister Gunn broke down and cried, and then she said, “When you love someone, you don’t want them to be alone forever. And I’m just so glad that this daughter-in-law that I love has found someone who loves her.”
I think you see the same attitude in Sister Gunn that Naomi had toward her widowed daughters-in-law, when Naomi was asking them not to come with her, Naomi said, “Turn again, my daughters: why will ye go with me? are there yet any more sons in my womb, that they may be your husbands?” (Ruth 1:11). In other words, Naomi is saying, “I have no one for you to marry. Stay here and find someone who will love you so that you won’t be alone.” But, in another way, Naomi’s statement lacked a little faith—because she didn’t trust that God would provide a husband for her daughters-in-law in Israel. As it turned out, Ruth didn’t forsake Naomi, and God didn’t forsake Ruth.
Another thing Ruth said to Naomi “Thy God will be my God” (Ruth 1:16).
We want to share our God with them because it is through Jesus Christ that our families are made eternal.
I think you’ll see in Ruth’s life that this isn’t just something she said one time; this great statement of hers is how she lived her life. And if you examine the story of Ruth and Naomi, I think you’ll come to see just how much Naomi needed her, and just how wonderfully Ruth treated her. I think the story teaches us how much we need each other and why families are so important. Our parents, our brothers, our sisters, our nieces and nephews—and, someday, our own spouses and children—their our support, and their our cause for carrying on. They are the people that matter most to us.
But there’s something that Brother Solomon once said that really sticks out in my mind: “The people we love the most are oftentimes the people we treat the worst.” And, of course, Brother Solomon was trying to encourage us to treat the people we love most the best. Ruth did that. She loved Naomi, and she treated Naomi with honor and love, and Ruth made great sacrifices to ensure Naomi was taken care of.
One of the first things I did this week in preparing this lesson was to search the Church Web site. I typed in Ruth’s name, and one of the first things I found was a talk by Elder F. Burton Howard about his wife’s obsession with silverware. I want to read a good portion of that talk because it really demonstrates the importance of treating those we love most—our family members—with the utmost love.
Elder Howard starts off his talk this way:
“A number of years ago my wife and I went to a garden wedding reception. Earlier that day we had been to the temple, where two young people we knew had been married for time and all eternity. They were much in love. The circumstances of their meeting had been almost miraculous. Many tears of happiness were shed. We stood in the reception line at the end of a perfect day. Ahead of us was a close friend of the family. As he approached the couple, he stopped and in a beautiful, clear tenor voice sang to them the stirring words from the book of Ruth: “Whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God: Where thou diest, will I die” (Ruth 1:16–17). We were deeply touched and felt reassured about their prospects for happiness—this in part, I suppose, because my wife and I have had these same words on the wall of our home for many years. Sadly, the significance of these beautiful words is subsiding. Far too many marriages today end in divorce. Selfishness, sin, and personal convenience often prevail over covenants and commitment.”
Obviously, if people came to a marriage—or any other type of familial relation—with the same commitment Ruth showed to Naomi, those relationships would work out.
Elder Howard then gets into the story of his wife’s silverware obsession:
“I think eternal marriage cannot be achieved without a commitment to make it work. Most of what I know about this I have learned from my companion. We have been married for almost 47 years now. From the beginning she knew what kind of marriage she wanted.
“We started as poor college students, but her vision for our marriage was exemplified by a set of silverware. As is common today, when we married she registered with a local department store. Instead of listing all the pots and pans and appliances we needed and hoped to receive, she chose another course. She asked for silverware. She chose a pattern and the number of place settings and listed knives, forks, and spoons on the wedding registry and nothing else. No towels, no toasters, no television—just knives, forks, and spoons.
“The wedding came and went. Our friends and our parents’ friends gave gifts. We departed for a brief honeymoon and decided to open the presents when we returned. When we did so, we were shocked. There was not a single knife or fork in the lot. We joked about it and went on with our lives.
“Two children came along while we were in law school. We had no money to spare. But when my wife worked as a part-time election judge or when someone gave her a few dollars for her birthday, she would quietly set it aside, and when she had enough she would go to town to buy a fork or a spoon. It took us several years to accumulate enough pieces to use them. When we finally had service for four, we began to invite some of our friends for dinner.
“Before they came, we would have a little discussion in the kitchen. Which utensils would we use, the battered and mismatched stainless or the special silverware? In those early days I would often vote for the stainless. It was easier. You could just throw it in the dishwasher after the meal, and it took care of itself. The silver, on the other hand, was a lot of work. My wife had it hidden away under the bed where it could not be found easily by a burglar. She had insisted that I buy a tarnish-free cloth to wrap it in. Each piece was in a separate pocket, and it was no easy task to assemble all the pieces. When the silver was used, it had to be hand washed and dried so that it would not spot, and put back in the pockets so it would not tarnish, and wrapped up and carefully hidden again so it would not get stolen. If any tarnish was discovered, I was sent to buy silver polish, and together we carefully rubbed the stains away.
“Over the years we added to the set, and I watched with amazement how she cared for the silver. My wife was never one to get angry easily. However, I remember the day when one of our children somehow got hold of one of the silver forks and wanted to use it to dig up the backyard. That attempt was met with a fiery glare and a warning not to even think about it. Ever!
“I noticed that the silverware never went to the many ward dinners she cooked, or never accompanied the many meals she made and sent to others who were sick or needy. It never went on picnics and never went camping. In fact it never went anywhere; and, as time went by, it didn’t even come to the table very often. Some of our friends were weighed in the balance, found wanting, and didn’t even know it. They got the stainless when they came to dinner.
“The time came when we were called to go on a mission. I arrived home one day and was told that I had to rent a safe-deposit box for the silver. She didn’t want to take it with us. She didn’t want to leave it behind. And she didn’t want to lose it.
“For years I thought she was just a little bit eccentric, and then one day I realized that she had known for a long time something that I was just beginning to understand. If you want something to last forever, you treat it differently. You shield it and protect it. You never abuse it. You don’t expose it to the elements. You don’t make it common or ordinary. If it ever becomes tarnished, you lovingly polish it until it gleams like new. It becomes special because you have made it so, and it grows more beautiful and precious as time goes by.”
I love that talk. And I think it’s so appropriate that Elder Howard used the example of Ruth to start off the talk. Because Ruth did treat Naomi differently; she treated her in a way that suggested Ruth wanted that relationship to last. Indeed, Ruth’s actions toward Naomi was consistent with her great love for Naomi. I think the challenge for each us is to treat those we love with love, with kindness and to put their own interest ahead of our own. That’s not always easy.
But it’s part of who we need to become. Because we want to be like our Savior—who thought never of Himself, but always of us, and who performed the greatest act of selflessness the world has ever seen, the Atonement, and we all have the chance to be beneficiaries of that Atonement. When we talk about relationships, we cannot ignore our relationship with Him. We should treat Him with respect. As we come to know Christ, as we come to love Christ, we must begin to treat Him with respect. We must treat His Great, Merciful and Infinite Sacrifice with sacredness, and we must come to know we truly were purchased with a price. And when come to realize what He has done for us, then it become our desire to walk in His paths, so that the Sacrifice he made for us can reclaim us. We don’t ever wish to abuse His Atonement in a sin-now-and-repent later scheme. Rather, we seek to honor His Atonement by keeping our covenants, learning of His ways and trying, as best we can, to walk in His established path. And we humbly live lives of gratitude—gratitude that He loved us enough to give us a chance.
We can never repay Him for what he has done for us, but what we can do is let our knowledge and our appreciation of His Atonement change us. When it changes us, it should change the way we treat others, for we know that He has said: “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me” (Matthew 25:45). The way we treat others reflects how we really feel about our Savior. Ruth let the gospel change her, and this woman, born into a nation that was the enemies of Israel, became an example to the Israelites because she let her light so shine. Perhaps this was best summed up by Ruth’s future husband, Boaz, who told her, “all the city of my people doth know that thou art a virtuous woman” (Ruth 3:11).
Ruth honored her covenants; she let the gospel change her; she treated the people whom she loved most the best; and she let her light shine. Her life reflected that of her Savior’s. May we be like Ruth and walk in the path the Savior has set.
