A couple years ago I was teaching a lesson on repentance. Unexpectedly, I felt inspired to talk about the following story from Luke 7:
And one of the Pharisees desired him that he would eat with him. And he went into the Pharisee’s house, and sat down to meat.
And, behold, a woman in the city, which was a sinner, when she knew that Jesus sat at meat in the Pharisee’s house, brought an alabaster box of ointment,
And stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment.
Now when the Pharisee which had bidden him saw it, he spake within himself, saying, This man, if he were a prophet, would have known who and what manner of woman this is that toucheth him: for she is a sinner. (v. 36-39)
From there, Jesus then tells this Pharisee a parable as a way of teaching him that the woman had changed; she was no longer a sinner—she was a Saint. As I finished telling this story, I felt inspired to say, “The Pharisee had seen this woman as a sinner; but Christ knew who she was—He knew she had changed. She had been redefined. She was no longer a sinner, but a woman of Christ. She had redefined herself through repentance, made possible by Christ.”
And, really, isn’t that what repentance is: The chance to shed your old self and replace it with a new, improved self? Since that experience, I’ve spent some time pondering on the phrase: “Redefinition through repentance.”
To me, repentance is another word for self-improvement. Repentance represents progression. You examine your life, and you say, “This is who I am” and “This is who I want to be,” and then with Christ’s help, you try to make up the difference. In this way, you are redefining who you are—You are saying to yourself, “I can change! I can be better!” You recognize that Christ can and will take away the ugly parts of our past. As Elder Neal A. Maxwell once said, “Yesterday need not hold tomorrow hostage.”
Who we were yesterday does not forecast who we will be tomorrow—for we each have the ability to change, to replace character flaws with character traits.
This is a particularly beautiful thought because we all have done some things that we would prefer not to remembered by. Personally, I want some actions off my record. I don’t want them to define who I am. Fortunately, through repentance, these actions are off my record and they do not define me. For the Lord has said: “Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more” (D&C 58:42). Of this verse, President Boyd K. Packer said, “Could there be any more sweeter or more consoling words, more filled with hope, than those words from the scriptures? ‘I, the Lord, remember [their sins] no more.’” I agree with President Packer: God’s willingness to forgive and forget is a beautiful doctrine. As long as we have cleared our record through the process of repentance, He will remember us only the good things about us. This particular attribute of the Savior’s—His willingness to forgive and forget—reflects that His mercy truly is infinite.
While He will forget our sins, I hope we never forget how it feels to be rescued from those sins. I hope we never forget the feeling of peace that comes with repentance. I hope we never forget the relief of having that burden of sin lifted from our shoulders.
Remembering the joys of repentance will motivate us to do several things:
First, it cultivates in us a gratitude for the Savior’s Atonement.. President J. Reuben Clark, Jr., once said, “I feel that [the Savior] will give that punishment which is the very least that our transgression will justify. … I believe that when it comes to making the rewards for our good conduct, he will give us the maximum that it is possible to give.” Any careful reading of the scriptures will reveal that such is the case. More importantly, any careful recounting of one’s life will reveal that Christ has indeed sought to minimize our hurt and maximize our joy. That’s why He is both our Redeemer and our Friend.
Secondly, the joy of repentance should motivate us to make the change permanent. That joy will give us courage to make the changes we need to make to align our lives with Christ’s. That is oftentimes a daunting process, but the joy of coming unto Christ through repentance will increase our drawer nearer unto Him always..
Remember: Change is possible. Said Elaine S. Dalton, “[A] group of youth adopted the motto “I Can Do Hard Things.” They understand their identity, their mission, their source of guidance, and they receive strength through keeping their covenants. They also understand that when they make a mistake, they can change! Satan wants all of us to think that repentance is not possible. This is absolutely not true. The Savior has promised forgiveness.” Important to this doctrine is realizing that the redemptive power of the Atonement removes the sins, and the enabling power of the Atonement strengthens us to make that change possible.
Thirdly, remembering the peaceful feeling that accompanies repentance will help us to forgive ourselves. Said President Boyd K. Packer: “Sometimes even after confession and penalties, the most difficult part of repentance is to forgive oneself.” President Joseph Fielding Smith told of a woman who had repented of immoral conduct and was struggling to find her way. She asked him what she should do now. In turn, he asked her to read to him from the Old Testament the account of Sodom and Gomorrah, of Lot, and of Lot’s wife, who was turned to a pillar of salt. Then he asked her what lesson those verses held for her.
She answered, “The Lord will destroy those who are wicked.”
“Not so,” President Smith told this repentant woman. “The lesson for you is, Don’t look back!”
Too often, the feelings of guilt take centerstage. But if Christ has forgiven us, isn’t that wallowing just a bunch of worthless worry? In the words of Elder Richard G. Scott: “Don’t live your life in despair, feeling sorry for yourself because of the mistakes you have made. Let the sunshine in by doing the right things—now.”
Finally, remembering the joy of repentance should create in us a desire to help others come unto Christ. A truly penitent person seeks for others to experience that same joy. Let’s revisit the story of the woman washing Jesus’ feet with her tears.
We can miss an important lesson here if we ignore the Pharisee. Simon the Pharisee shared many of the shortsighted views that his fellow Pharisees did. It appears he invited Christ to dinner not to honor the Savior—but to find fault with the Savior. One scholar explains: “It may well be that Simon hoped to observe (or contrive) some event in which he could find cause to turn the multitudes away from Christ” (Ted E. Gibbons).
This was a common practice among the Pharisees: trying to find a fault in the Savior, for Christ was disrupting the pleasure they had in judging themselves to be more righteous than the rest of the. In short, the Pharisees were too busy looking down at Jesus to realize they needed to kneel down to Jesus.
The true gospel counters this damaging attitude of self-righteousness, as disciples are urged to be meek. Said Elder Maxwell: “Meekness ranks low on the mortal scale of things, yet high on God's: `For none is acceptable before God, save the meek and lowly in heart' (Moro. 7:44). Meekness is critical in repentance because it recognizes the need for the Savior. None of us could be saved on our own merits—we all need Him. It would be senseless—and truly unmeek—to say that I need the Savior less than you.
King Benjamin, in imploring his people to be charitable, said, “For behold, are we not all beggars? Do we not all depend upon the same Being . . .?” (Mosiah 4:19). Since we all depend on the same God, we cannot justly say: We are better or more righteous. Rather our focus should be on keeping ourselves pure and helping others overcome their sins. The Pharisees competed to be the most righteous—resultantly, they were only interested in saving themselves, as saving others would mean more competition; in contrast, true Saints aren’t competing with each other rather they work together—resultantly, they are interested in the salvation of all men. Perhaps Nephi said it best when he ended his record, saying, “And I pray the Father in the name of Christ that many of us, if not all, may be saved in his kingdom at that great and last day” (2 Nephi 33:12).
As I consider this story of this woman, I can’t help but see the similarities to the story of a good friend of mine. During our sophomore year of high school, this friend of mine had made some serious mistakes. Like the woman in this story, she developed an unfavorable reputation—and rumors began to circulate about her.
But during our junior year, she changed—she repented and made the changes that she needed to make. It was a real struggle for her. But she persevered, and through repentance, redefined herself: she was a woman of God. I remember toward the end of that year, they had a microphone and camera set up in the seminary lobby for people to go bear their testimonies, which were then broadcast to each of the classrooms.
As she bore her testimony of the Savior, I could hear a couple of guys behind cackling that she would be bearing a testimony. That really bothered me. She had changed. She had been forgiven. She had been redefined. And just as Simon the Pharisee misjudged the woman who came into his house, these guys misjudged my friend.
As I reflected on that this week, I came across this question in the manual: “How would Simon’s attitude toward the woman have made her burden seem heavier?” As I relate this experience to that of my friend’s, I know the rumors hurt her—I know those rumors served to damage her self-worth and her resolve to make the needed changes. It’s almost ironic that these two guys sitting in seminary, probably preparing for a mission to go out and save souls, didn’t realize that their participation in these rumors caused so much harm to a soul that needed saving. Perhaps they too could have benefited from the parable the Savior told Simon—the point of which is when great sins are forgiven, the penitent shows great love for the Savior.
The lesson here may well be this: We all are going to make mistakes. None of us want those mistakes to define us. The truth is: We all need a Savior. To each of us, a Savior is provided. Wrote Nephi: “[Christ] inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him.” Because of the Atonement, our mistakes don’t need to define us. But because we want that chance to redefine and refine ourselves through Christ’s Atonement, we also need to afford others that same chance. In that spirit, perhaps we need to be slower to judge and quicker to love. In doing so, we show our reverence for the Atonement, we acknowledge that we too have been and will continue to be rescued from our sins. Once on the strait-and-narrow, we shouldn’t be in such a rush that we fail to stop and help lift someone onto the path. By helping others come unto Christ, we show our gratitude for the Atonement. After all, we know that those who today are sinners may tomorrow be redefined as Saints.
